He's Really Gone Now

Kenneth is "officially" deployed now - they flew out and should be in Japan by today. I haven't heard anything yet, but hope maybe I'll get an e-mail soon.

Sunday was rough, getting ready to say goodbye and getting choked up but I did my best to not break down in front of Kenneth, I didn't want to add any stress for him. I kept it together and we dropped him off at the airport and said our goodbyes. I was a little teary and kept having mini panic attacks yesterday, I'm hoping that was the worst of it. Today I feel much better, my chest still feels heavy when I think about it all, but I'm taking it one day at a time and focusing on Kent and the house and our life here. Keeping everything together and running smoothly, that's my goal for the moment. I will be doing my very best to stay really, really busy and hope it will help the time pass by quickly and productively too. Kenneth got the treadmill set up in the living room again for me, and I plan to use that any time I am watching TV, and we ordered an attachment for it that will hold my books so I can read and walk/jog too now which I'm excited about. I think that will help keep my mind busy during "down time" when I would normally sit on the couch and watch a show or two and do some internet browsing. It will be a great way to get some extra exercise in too, especially since its so cold and icky out now - not good walking weather! Today it is rainy and overcast, not inviting at all.

Kent had jiu jitsu last night, he didn't seem to be much in the mood. I really hope he changes his mind and attitude about that class and starts putting more of himself into it, so he'll get more out of it. I am planning to get some foam matting for the basement so he can practice some on his days off of class.

I have plenty to keep me busy at work, but I am so distracted and probably will be for awhile. I need to focus on making the best of it all, and being a productive employee until it comes more naturally again!


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