The first 3 weeks

Our little one is 3 weeks old today - the days are passing by in a complete blur! Full of resting, waking, bottles, nursing, diapers, laundry, washing bottles, sterilizing bottles, and trying to keep up with normal household chores somewhere in between. Kent has been a huge help with errands and bottle washings, and helping with getting meals on the table. I am glad I stocked the freezer with meals that can be frozen and prepared pretty easily, but we're still trying to find some sort of "groove" when it comes to meal time. With my schedule all over the place, since I'm on Lindsey's schedule, meal time has been a little "loose" lately!

Now that things are starting to settle into some sort of routine, or at least I'm adjusting to the lack of one, I'm trying to get things like dinner back on track again and actually put some thought and effort into it! I thawed a package of marinated chicken from the freezer last night and that will get baked up tonight, along with a fresh salad and some pasta.

Lindsey is doing well, eating like a champ, and growing before our eyes. I would love to be exclusively breastfeeding her, but it doesn't appear to be in the cards. I am just not producing enough to meet her needs. She nurses with every feeding, but I have to give her formula each time as well. I have tried some pumping in between feedings, but it is stressful to try to fit that in on top of everything else since she's nursing too - I have resigned myself to the fact that this is just the way it's going to be. At least she's getting some breastmilk, and thanks to getting her tongue clipped at 1 week she is able to latch well and I enjoy sharing those bonding moments with her. Maybe in time my supply will increase, but if not I am trying to be ok with it. I was really beating myself up about it the first week or so - on top of crazy hormones and everything else going on there was a lot of crying going on around here!! Lindsey has reflux and our first 2 weeks with her were pretty rough. She kept having long stretches of time (6+ hours at a time) where she was obviously experiencing pain and discomfort. She would scrunch herself up and grunt and scream and nothing would console her. She wanted to eat or nurse constantly during that time, or suck on something, and was so angry about it - biting, scratching, hitting in frustration. It was completely breaking our hearts! We took her to the ER just a couple days after bringing her home the first time it happened. We were on and off the phone with the pediatricians office, and took her in for multiple visits. After the 3rd visit an x-ray of her abdomen was ordered, and when it was verified she didn't have a blockage she started liquid Zantac twice daily and we discovered a whole new baby. I had been calling her "episodes" Mr. Hyde - she was like two completely different people depending on how she was feeling! It was a little nerve wracking not knowing what to expect and when she might start screaming again. Needless to say, I am very grateful she is feeling better, eating well, sleeping well, growing and doing so much better now. It's been a pretty good week with her! She has started to have a somewhat noticeable sleeping pattern - she goes down anywhere between 9pm and midnight and sleeps for 3 - 4 hours straight, wakes for about an hour to eat, and goes back down for another 2 hours, and usually does that at least once more before she gets into her daytime pattern of shorter sleep periods and longer awake periods. I am learning to go to sleep as soon as she goes down at night and make the most of that longer stretch of time! I am feeling not quite so zombie like the past couple days, though I still need to make sure to nap at least once with her during the day to avoid having my brain turn to complete mush.

I love having these days at home with her, and am already counting down with anxiety my remaining 5 weeks at home before I have to go back to work. I'm not looking forward to leaving her in daycare, but I know it has to be done and it is what it is. I just wish I could have awhile longer home with her. We're going to swing by the daycare this afternoon to visit the baby rooms and get a tour of that part - it's the same daycare Kent used to go to, so I'm taking him with so he can visit and say hi to the teachers that are still there. When I called to make the appointment to visit the person I spoke to remembered us both which was sweet - it's been about 3 years since he was there last!

I have been taking pictures of Lindsey like crazy - they grow so dang fast. I ordered a photo book yesterday of our pregnancy through her first two weeks, and also birth announcements to send out to family. I ordered prints of a bunch of pictures to include with the birth announcements for the grandparents who don't really spend time on Facebook where I've been posting lots of pictures almost every day. She is a doll, and a very good photo subject. :)

Since she's still napping at the moment, I will wrap this up, finish up some chores and maybe catch a few minutes of rest for myself too.